If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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