Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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