So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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