bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize