I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
