Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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