I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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