but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
