True but thats because hes a fetus.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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