help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
