A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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