My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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