yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
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