Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
