I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
