I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
