Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Two words: blizzard sex
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize
