He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
