He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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