Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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