You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night