I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
