people are starting to question the shark bite story
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
