Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I want you more than these girls want KFC
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
