smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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