yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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