do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
