If i come over, it means nothing
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
So much rum. So many feels.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
