hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
