just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
