This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
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I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
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His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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