okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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