I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
