Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Every concussion has its silver lining
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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