i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
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