she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
