The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize