we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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