I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
