TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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