i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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