i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend