FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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