I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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