She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
What happened to fro yo and sex?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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