im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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