They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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