When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
