i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
