i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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