You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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